Forgiveness is one of those things (at least for me) that is great in theory, but very, very difficult in actual application. I've worked really hard on myself this last year. And locked away in the confines of my beautiful Burbank apartment, I'm a pretty nice person. I make myself laugh (not that that was ever a problem) and I imagine dealing with the people that have hurt me the most it a gracious and kind manner. After all harboring all this anger and resentment only hurts me. I know that. But then, recently, I actually found myself in a room with some of those people and fuck it all if I could be nice. Or even punch down the anger that bubbled over at the very sight of them. Ugh!
And I guess in the end, the person that I'm most angry with is myself. How could I have let these draining people in my life? Why can't I just let it go already? Why do I care? So I'm writing this as a final release. And I feel pretty good sitting here in front of my computer. I just hope the next opportunity for practical application goes off smashingly. Until then, I forgive myself.
And yes, I know this post is emo as hell. Paul and Will, just let it go. You too Rake...
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